'n Ondersoek na die pastoraal-terapeutiese interaksie tussen vergifnis, selfvergifnis en spiritualiteit

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Van der Merwe, Carel Lodewyk

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University of the Free State

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English: This research deals with the pastoral therapeutic interaction between forgiveness, self-forgiveness and spirituality. From a deaconological epistemology, taking post-modem strategies, including narrative therapy, into account, it is demonstrated how God, as the primary Forgiver, grants forgiveness in order to give the offender and the victim, absolution. Phenomenological observations and qualitative discussions with interlocutors were conducted in order to gain a clear practice theory perspective on the role of forgiveness and self-forgiveness in people's lives. In this way, interlocutors' opinions on the role spirituality played during the process of forgiveness and self-forgiveness were also obtained. Biblical principles are the point of departure for this study. These principles include the following: covenant, guilt, shame, hate, hope, confession of guilt and reconciliation. Specific passages of Scripture are used to obtain a Biblical perspective of the subject, although not all the applicable parts of Scripture were dealt with or even attempting an exegesis. The research, using a qualitative and practical theoretical approach, gives perspectives on the dynamics of forgiveness and places the subject within the context of pastoral therapy. Various meta-theories regarding forgiveness are highlighted. Obstacles and blockages, which impede forgiveness processes, are investigated. This includes the role, pathology, anxiety, neurotic guilt, narcissism, and secrecy plays in the impediment of forgiveness as well as the danger of false forgiveness. A definition of forgiveness within a deaconological-reformed framework is provided. Attention is also given to the role of restitution within the forgiveness process. The role of forgiveness within a pastoral therapeutic context is also dealt with. The role of the therapist, his skills regarding the handling of forgiveness processes in forgiveness therapy as well as the realationship and contract between the therapist and the person in therapy are dealt with. A forgiveness approach is established by pointing out the elements within this potential approach. The role of choice and decision making in forgiveness are pointed out. Using a diagram, it is demonstrated that all offences do not have the same impact on people and that the impact of the offence also has an effect on the passage of forgiveness. Self-forgiveness, as a consequence of God's forgiveness, forms part of a specific section of this study. Self-forgiveness cannot be removed from the forgiveness that God grants. This study shows that self-forgiveness is impossible if the person has not received God's forgiveness. A person cannot grant himself forgiveness. Forgiveness and self-forgiveness are connected to each other and can thus not be anything other than interdynamic. The role spiritual growth plays to give forgiveness and self-forgiveness its shape, is studied. A short, historical overview of spiritual development is provided, and an attempt to define Reformed spirituality from this viewpoint is made. The place and role of inner healing as well as physical health, within the context of interaction between forgiveness and spirituality is also examined. In conclusion, the pastoral therapist is provided with a five-step practice theory with which he can facilitate forgiveness therapy. Through the use of post-modem strategies and Biblical principles and perspectives, the pastoral therapist can lead the person in therapy in order to experience forgiveness.

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